A Mood-and-a-Half

That's what it's called in my house when I have "a moment." Sometimes the moment lasts for more than just a moment though. This past Saturday, it lasted from about 9am until 3pm. My poor, patient husband... I've been bitter with him lately. The reason? To sum it up, we bought a new car and I got his old car. Instead of counting my blessings that we can even afford to buy a car, I have been consumed with jealousy and a woe-is-me mentality. I am so dissappointed in myself for feeling this way and I'm trying hard to just let it go. I think I'm almost there. Almost.

On Saturday, he proposed that we go to the store to purchase car wash needs and then wash our cars. I mentioned that after we stopped at the store, we could go to McDonald's for a coffee. He said, "Then we'll take your car. No coffee in my car." My jaw dropped. No closed-lid coffee? I won't open it. I'll put a napkin around it. I'll hold it. Nope. No coffee in the car. I know this sounds silly, but in my female mind that I don't even understand sometimes, I associated the care that he has for his car with the care that he has for me and I saw one as being greater than the other. I'll let you guess which was on the losing end.

In sets the mood. The whole time we were washing our cars, I was foul. The poor guy couldn't make a correct move, say a correct sentence, nothing. God love him, he kept on truckin'. He was trying hard to be sweet, and I was turning everything sour. The afternoon proceeded the same way. I figured I'd try to keep myself busy, so I moved to ironing. Mid-chore, we got a call from friends inviting us to hang out. He wanted to go. I said I wasn't interested, but that he should go without me. Up to this point, we could ignore the mood, but now it was out in the open.

An hour later, I was done crying. God is so good to me. If he'd sent any other guy my way, I probably would've been left standing alone in my kitchen in tears. I don't take back the arguments I was making or the feelings I feel, but I do know that Josh is a special guy. He is patient just like my dad and I am (a little) neurotic, just like my mom. They just celebrated their 35th anniversary. My mom and dad always say that they are each other's best friend. I love that. In my hysteria, Josh told me that I'm his best friend. He doesn't know how much that meant to me. He loves me (and likes me) even when I'm in more than a mood: a mood-and-a-half. God help us all if it's ever a double-mood!

How did it end? Peacefully. I insisted that Josh go to our friend's house. I just wanted to calm down. I ended up going to chuch and the sacrament of reconciliation. It felt good. I wasn't done crying though. That poor priest! I hope you know that when you feel overwhelmed and down, God is waiting for you to reach out to him. He's patient, just like my husband (probably a little bit more) even when you're in a mood.

-Abby